Friday, October 29, 2004

Eleven Years Of Marriage

(c) Andy Ternay
Just over a day from now, eleven years ago, Laura and I stood before a priest and vowed that we would make a team, she and I. Our greatest strength then was that we were friends before we were lovers, or even husband and wife. Laura and I are still friends first. She is my absolute best friend in the world, ever. Goddess willing, we shall have many more years together.

Our marriage has had its share of problems; my alcoholism being the absolute number one top problem. Three and three quarters years ago, Laura was leaving me. Everything was falling apart. I asked for the help of a Higher Power and things started to come back together. Over these three plus years, I have grown (I hope) from a selfish thirty-five year old adolescent into a man. Laura has stayed with me through this entire process. In fact, she has been there to lend a hand when I needed it and has left me alone when I needed it.

I hope that I have been there for her when she has been in need. I’m doing the best I can to be the partner, lover and friend that she wants me to be. Some days I fall way short of the standard, some days I feel I hit the mark.

One of the things that I have done for her, which I really enjoyed doing, is reading to her. I have read her all of the Harry Potter novels, The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings in its entirety. It is a special time for just she and I as we sit on the bed and I read to her. Event the dogs and the cats seem to enjoy it, stretching out on the bed and listening as though I were addressing them specifically.

We are both activists again, throwing molotive cocktails at presidential motorcades and such.

Ok, that is simply not true. We are activists though. And we recycle like the tree hugging extremists we are. Laura is the one who has taught me about taking care of this world and I still learn from her.

The God thing is interesting because the man she married, an atheist/agnostic type, is now a Goddess worshipper. I was actually pretty afraid my faith would hurt the marriage. Fortunately, Laura knew more about love and tolerance than I did and she takes it in stride. I think she is happy for me. She walks her own spiritual path and I won’t even pretend to understand hers. I’m just glad she is on it.

Now it looks like we are going to raise a child together.

I can’t tell you how grateful I am today, to be alive, to be sober, to be married to Laura. There really are not good enough words in the English language to express it. I’ve been blessed and I know it.

Good Morning Goddess Brigit, my name is Andy and I am an alcoholic. I have been kept sober since Imbolc 2001 by Your grace and Your grace alone. I’d like to take this moment to thank You, my Higher Power for this, my daily reprieve. Today is a good day to be sober.

Please, Goddess, be with me today all through the day and help me to stay sober all day long. Show me Your will for me and grant me the power to carry that out. Thy will, not mine, be done. Be welcome in me and to me; body, heart, mind and soul. Thank You, Blessed Be.