Short Post, Lots of Feelings

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My sponsor, Nici, has fired her sponsor.

This actually happened a few days ago, but I was trying to sort through my feelings about this before I wrote about it. Really, my feelings about the whole thing should not matter at all. What is important is that my sponsor do what she needs to stay sober and grow spiritually. With that said, I have a very mixed bag of emotions about this.

I would like to keep the same sponsor for decades. But if my sobriety was in danger then I would have to find a new one. After all, that is how I got my current sponsor.

It might be useful to stop for a moment and define the word sponsor. In Alcoholics Anonymous a sponsor is a person who guides you through working the twelve steps of the program of AA by sharing their experience, strength and hope. Sponsors are not necessarily your friend, although over the years a friendship may develop. Sponsors do not do any of the work for you, they simply show you how they did it or make suggestions about handling specific situations. Often, a sponsor is called upon to provide perspective on a problem that the sponsee is in the middle of and when the sponsee cannot develop an objective view.

I actually am frightened by the idea that someday I might have to fire Nici. I don’t want to, she and I have become friends. But I need to be working the steps and right now it is very difficult for me to find time when both of us are free to do so.

Hmmm. I have not sorted out my feelings after all. Sorry for such a short post, but I think I will call it quits right here, right now.

Good Morning Goddess Brigit, my name is Andy and I am an alcoholic. You have given me the gift of sobriety one day at time since Imbolc 2001. I want to thank You for keeping me sober and invite You into my life, even the parts of it I’m not proud of, today. I welcome You, Goddess. Please be with Linda as she recovers from surgery. Thank You, Blessed Be.