New Daddy Boot Camp

For those of you with a scientific bent, this is a pretty fancy trilobite. For those of you who favor fundamentalism this is an example of how a cruel patriarchical Diety fucks with you in order to test your faith.

That's what I'm up to today. Should be fun. I think I learn how to change a diaper, wipe a bottom and burp a baby. I'm excited and a little nervous. I guess the course is taught by recent fathers. So, the teacher will be a sleep and sex deprived male who'll jump at the least little high pitched noise.

I was really much more interested in the class Laura is taking: breastfeeding. In a move that recalls Texas' segregationist past, the hospital only allows WOMEN to take the class. I was going to stage a sit-in, but my wife threatened to take extreme measures if I did not behave, so I will be a good quiet boy.

What my wife does not know is that thanks to the miracle of Google I can find out anything I need to on lactation. For instance, I found this very informative site, obviously intended for new fathers, called Tit Squirts (for the benefit of El Capitan let me stress this link is NSFW). This site appears to offer informative and educational videos about the benefits of breastfeeding.

How much you wanna bet that I'm the only one in class wearing a kilt?

Hope ya'll have as good a day as I intend to!